What Is Intimacy, How To Create Intimacy, Love And Intimacy

Intimacy refers to a familiar and very close connection with another as a result of entering deeply or closely into relationship through knowledge and experience of the other. Genuine intimacy in human relationships requires dialogue, transparency, vulnerability and reciprocity. As a verb "intimate" means "to state or make known". The activity of intimating (making known) underpins the meanings of "intimate" when used as a noun and adjective. As a noun, an "intimate" is a person with whom we have a particularly close relationship.

There's something about our psychological, spiritual, and physical makeup that cries out for intimacy with another. Are you and your partner intimate in these ways?

Intellectual intimacy. This isn't about discussing highly intellectual ideas. The important thing is discussing your thoughts. They may be thoughts about food, finances, health, crime, work, politics. They reveal something of what's gone on in your mind throughout the day.

Social intimacy. This has to do with spending time around the events of life. Some of these events we experience together; others happen while we're apart and are shared through open communication. Much of life involves doing. When we do things together, we not only develop a sense of teamwork, we also enhance our sense of intimacy.

Emotional intimacy. Feelings are our spontaneous, emotional responses to what we encounter through the five senses. I see the fire truck racing down the road and I feel troubled. You touch my hand and I feel loved. When we share emotions, we build emotional intimacy.

Spiritual intimacy. Often the least excavated of all the foundations of intimacy between partners, yet this has a significant impact on the others. It doesn't require agreement of belief on every detail. Instead, we seek to tell each other what's going on in our inner self. It's discussing our thoughts about spiritual realities. The purpose isn't agreement, but understanding.

Physical intimacy. Because men and women are different (long live their differences!), we often come at sexual intimacy in different ways. The husband's emphasis is often on the physical aspects—the seeing, touching, and climax are the focus of his attention. The wife, though, comes to sexual intimacy with more interest in the relationship. To feel loved, appreciated, and treated tenderly brings her great joy. Sexual intimacy requires understanding and responding to these differences.

Practicing Intimacy

An essential ingredient of intimacy is allowing your partner to be his/her self without striving to conform them to your ideals.

In intimacy, we try to grow closer together, not to eliminate the "otherness," but to enjoy it. Men and women are different and we must not, even with good intentions, seek to destroy those differences.

Intimacy in your partnership involves more than having good sex. Intimacy is achieved when the two of you can share your thoughts, opinions, and feelings with one another.

Your intimacy is also strengthened when you two are spending time as a couple, having fun together, and surprising one another.

So do it! Do something today so you and your spouse can be more intimate!

Leave a Romantic Note for Your Spouse Although what you say in the love note is important, where you leave the love note is important, too!
Give a Small Gift ... Just Because You Love Your Spouse Receiving or giving an unexpected gift is a true delight.
Take a Walk Together Surprise your spouse with a long, romantic kiss and a suggestion to take a walk together. Make sure you hold hands while you walk. Think about taking that walk in the moonlight on a pleasant evening or in a spring rain.
Watch a Romantic Movie Snuggle together on the couch with some popcorn and enjoy a romantic movie together
Have a Picnic Put a blanket on the floor in your bedroom and enjoy an intimate picnic with one another. Or go to a pretty park for the picnic, or have a Silly Supper instead of a picnic
Get Frisky Make out in the backseat of your car or rent a motel room close by your home. One night stands together are great!
Have a Lunch Date Make some couple time for one another by scheduling a lunch date
Have Fun Together Whether it is going on a spontaneous trip, dancing, hiking, walking on a beach, washing your car, going antiquing, seeing a show, reading a book together, hosting a party for friends, etc., having fun together is critical for the success of your marriage.
Deepen Your Relationship Making time to deepen your relationship with one another is a wonderful way to create intimacy in your lives. Try some of these activities.
Say "I Love You Sure, you say "I love you" to your spouse in words - but there are other meaningful ways to say "I love you."

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